u/TacosandFantasyFB via Reddit
December 24, 2021, 10:58 am
Relationships are complicated, but throwing an affair (or five) into the mix generally doesn’t do much to help untangle things. Actually, figuring out how things got to that point in the first place, both in terms of the initial relationship and the stepping out, is often its own set of puzzles, sometimes only solved with distance and perspective.
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And sometimes, there just aren’t any answers at all. But Redditors are doing their best to answer that tricky question — how did your affair start? Whether there’s peace to be found in understanding remains a personal question, but in the meantime, folks are sharing their stories all the same.
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1.
I was told “you’re lucky that you have me, if you ever leave me you’ll die alone because no one would want you” so I had this burning desire to prove her wrong. Ended up sleeping with her boss.
2.
Found out she was cheating on me. Decided to cheat on her as an act of “revenge.” It did not make me feel any better, pretty much the exact opposite actually. I just felt like I was a piece of shit as well. It was a very short “affair.”
3.
I joined a gym. She was my instructor. I fell in love with a healthy lifestyle and being around healthy people. I wasn’t getting that at home. Anyhow, our 16 year anniversary is coming up… And yes, we boned at the gym.
4.
She started telling me about relationship troubles. We grew closer over time, sharing insecurities and what not. Eventually we developed feelings, on which we could not act. Eventually, those feelings became too strong and we caved.
5.
I cheated on my son’s mom for a few months with an exotic dancer. I was driving for a ride share company at the time and took her home. She showed me her breasts unsolicited and invited me in to hang out. We hooked up on multiple occasions in the next three or so months.
6.
Met her at my (now ex) wife’s birthday party. Asked wife if I could fuck her and wife said sure. We got along great and started dating, all above board with the wife. Wife eventually gets jealous and says no more. I kept it up behind her back. Eventually dumped the wife due to her coke problem.
7.
I met a married lady while at Myrtle Beach She was in a crappy marriage Piña Colada or two later we were talking. Yada yada. Ended up together for several years. I felt a little bad about the beginning situation but it was the Best years of my crappy life. And hers i think. Miss her everyday.
8.
I wasn’t happy in my marriage. I was traveling for work and was at dinner with someone else who had traveled into the location. We were the last two out and were talking. I asked about her family, she said her husband was an asshole. One thing led to another, and we started an affair for the next 2 years.
9.
We met at work and started having threesomes with my wife. One thing led to another and we started hooking up without her. Thankfully my wife forgave me and we were able to reconcile. It was the dumbest thing I’ve ever done. If you’re considering cheating—let me assure you—you will either get caught or (hopefully) be so consumed with guilt that you will rat yourself out.
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10.
The wife of a guitarist in a relatively famous band from the early 2000s met me and I was strung along with the “I don’t want to be with him” promises, building me up into a jealous man that I promised I’d never be by fueling the seriousness of the affair but also sleeping with other men, and conceding that it was “cheating” on ME, never really addressing that we’re doing that, but okay.
11.
She came onto me, I knew she was married and I struggled with the morality of it but ended up caving because I really liked her. Turns out she was in an abusive relationship, nothing physical, just mental, and she’d been considering divorce for several months. We stayed together after she got divorced and ended up getting married ourselves. It’s not something I’m overly proud of, but I wouldn’t change anything if I had a chance to do it again.
12.
I was stuck in a non-physical marriage with a hoarder(rats were living in the dryer, as example) who didn’t keep up with house repairs. Spent 4 months drinking bottled water because the well wasn’t safe without work. Couldn’t get out because I was 20 km from anywhere, was given a car that didn’t run. Coworker usually picked me up for work, or I walked to the closest carpool lot. Cracked under the lonely stress when coworker found me attractive.
13.
I host trivia. A regular player came most weeks. We got to know eachother better each week. Started having feelings for one another. We eventually started meeting up at his place for sex every week after trivia before I went home. Completely flew under the radar since I had been hosting for a few years at this point and I was already gone the same night every week. My husband at the time travelled for work lots so we graduated from weekly meetups to meeting more, either at my place or his, while my husband was away.
14.
So I guess I was just part of it, it wasn’t “my” affair. This was like 12 years ago. I was 19 she was 24 and married, they were in the process of getting a divorce but she sort of failed to tell me they were technically still married. The dude was trying to fix the marriage at the time, which is what I learned eventually so he eventually found out about me and was rightfully pissed but not so much at me but at her. I straight up told him she wears no ring and said she was recently divorced. I felt like shit but the sex was incredible lol, lasted like 6 months and I got out of that whole scenario completely.
15.
She was an older (mid 30s) banker type, like super nerd hot. She was funny and worldly and she took a huge interest in me. Told me to meet her one day in the safe (where all the sensitive paper files use to be kept). I thought it was for legit business and next thing I knew she was going down on me. Kept it quiet cause I was like 18 and figured it’d be an awesome little summer fling, and obviously we weren’t supposed to be getting it on at work… Then I found out after about the hottest month of sex I ever had, that she was keeping it quiet because she was fucking married.
*First Published: December 24, 2021, 10:58 am
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