Photo via @atrupar/Twitter
February 5, 2021, 11:51 am
Today marked the release of the highly anticipated “documentary” by MyPillow guy Mike Lindell, who promised that it would prove beyond any doubt that Donald Trump won the 2020 election. What everyone outside of QAnon heard was a promise for an absolutely bonkers three hours of bizarre ramblings, and boy did he deliver.
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The “documentary,” titled Absolute Proof, aired on OAN after they displayed a lengthy disclaimer explaining that this is just Lindell’s opinion and not theirs, following massive lawsuit threats from voting machine companies. It starts by explaining that Lindell purchased the air time from OAN and goes on to state that what he and his guests are about to say is “not established fact.”
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The meat of Lindell’s ramblings seems to be that China and various “other countries” used Dominion and Smartmatic voting machines to change votes from Donald Trump to Joe Biden. Here’s what happens when you transcribe his words:
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“But here’s the big thing, the big miracle: If they would’a done that, if they would’a done that and said ‘you know what, we can’t count these, Mr. Trump wins, Donald Trump wins,’ okay, then we wouldn’t be where we’re at right now. Because the biggest thing against humanity and our country is this attack through these machines, they got this opened up, this revealed, the machines, to where we’re at right now.”
When Lindell’s not talking like that, he’s listening to his guests repeat the same conspiracy theories in a more boring tone of voice while playing ominous background music to try and jazz it up. He also managed to invent the word “cyberly,” which does not help improve his appearance as an authority into these complex “machines” he keeps talking about.
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“You’re saying that 27 states used this, and their servers are overseas, so these can go over there, and they can change the vote to anything they want and send it back cyberly. By cyber.”
“By cyber,” of course, being the technical term for data crossing borders from one server to another.
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Lindell also seems to have spent a good portion of his three hours on air to attack “cancel culture,” which he blames for his getting banned from Twitter.
Dominion Voting Systems and Smartmatic have already threatened Lindell with lawsuits after dropping billion-dollar suits on Rudy Giuliani, Sidney Powell, and most recently, Fox News. Many are speculating that these companies may have been waiting for Absolute Proof to drop so that they could use it to build their cases against him.
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*First Published: February 5, 2021, 11:51 am
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