Being a mom of multiple kids is super hard, and mothers don’t get a lot of support in our society. But that doesn’t mean people without kids have nothing going on, or are obligated to step in and take care of the kids other people choose to have. This basic concept gets lost a lot though, especially amongst family. A Redditor named u/Throw_away_no374828 who posted on r/AmItheA–hole got ripped a new one for forgetting it.
She says she has four kids, ages 11 months, 3, 5, and 10.
“I love them all more than anything, but I’ll be the first to admit that our house is constant chaos and it can get very exhausting,” she says, before explaining that her younger sister is child free and has still chosen to help her our a lot by watching the older ones for her.
She added, “This has been extremely helpful and I tell her all the time how grateful we are for her help.”
But the free babysitting train came to a stop one day when her sister decided to foster a chihuahua that couldn’t be around children. Though the sister continued to come by some mornings to help out, she could no longer have children at her house. This is apparently the fourth foster dog lil’ sis’ has had that couldn’t be around children. When it finally got placed in a home, the OP was thrilled, saying, “I knew I could finally breathe a sigh of relief and joked about how I was so glad she could babysit again.”
But things didn’t go how she wanted:
My sister proceeded to tell me that there was a second dog that desperately needed a new foster, so she planned to take in that one as soon as her current dog was gone. So, she couldn’t do anymore babysitting than she already is (sometimes she comes over to my house in the morning to help out). I could literally feel my stress levels spike. I haven’t ever done this before, but I opened up to her about how much I have been struggling since she got the dog. How little sleep I get each night, how my husband hasn’t been helping as much as he should, and some other deeply personal issues that I’ve been struggling with. Then I asked her, point blank, to not get another dog.
She comforted me, but ultimately didn’t agree on anything and said she needed some time to think. I know I am asking a lot of her since rescuing dogs is her passion and that is why I feel so guilty. But I don’t have anyone else to help me. I can’t afford a babysitter long term, and my friends all have their own kids to look after. Above all, my kids will always come before a dog and that’s the reason I was willing to request it. I’ve told a few different people about the situation and gotten a wide range of heavily biased opinions. So that’s why I decided to come on here and as you guys. Was this unreasonable? I would never demand her to do this if she didn’t want to, but is it really so wrong to just be honest my situation and earnestly ask?
The comments. Hooooo boy, the comments.
Pretty much everyone told the OP that her entitlement was off the charts, and the only person she should be insisting take of her kids is her husband. She clarified in a later comment that her husband has clinical depression which she claims didn’t pop up until after their youngest child was born (a lot of people were wondering why she kept having kids). But this comment pretty much sums the whole thing up, which is why it was voted the highest:
It’s possible to be sympathetic to OP, because she’s clearly in over her head. But there are a lot of other steps she could take before asking someone else to give up their life over her decisions.
*First Published: April 9, 2022, 9:21 am
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