People Are Calling Out Fake “Happy Amazon Employees” On Twitter

Photo via @timjsully/Twitter

March 30, 2021, 11:29 am

Amazon is once making headlines after appearing to undermine efforts by their lowest-paid and worst-treated employees to unionize.

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After the whole debacle with Amazon News suggesting that the workers who have reported needing to urinate in bottles to get through a shift are liars, people are starting to uncover and expose clear “sock puppet” accounts pretending to be real Amazon employees.

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Perhaps the poorest attempt at this was the account of “Burt” who declared himself a “Happy Amazon employee” in his Twitter bio that was created in March 2021 and has zero followers. Oh, and he’s also apparently a member of an “American sports and comedy group” called Dude Perfect based out of Texas that is suddenly getting a lot of publicity.

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Democratic party researcher Tim Sullivan was was easily able to find the source of the young man in the backwards hat in a photo of the group that comes up in the top spot of a Google search for the group’s name. His tweet exposing this, along with a tweet falsely claiming that union members have to “shell out hundreds a month just for lawyers” went viral in less than a day.

You would think that a company with as much money as Amazon would know how easy it is for people to reverse-search images on the internet—if the company is, in fact, responsible for the fake accounts.

Another notable example emerged after another account accused of being a sock puppet had to backpedal hard for saying that she couldn’t afford union dues because she was only just scraping by as it is — on an Amazon wage.

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“What bothers me most about unions is there’s no ability to opt out of dues!” wrote “Darla” on Twitter. “As a single mother with two boys I’m barely scraping by as it is.”

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After people began pointing out that she might be able to afford more things if she got a raise via union negotiations and maybe the problem is that Amazon isn’t paying her enough, Darla slammed into reverse, blaming herself and her personal choice to have two children for her situation.

“Amazon takes great care of me!” she insisted. “It isn’t anyone’s fault that I have children to take care of, that makes my person expenses higher than most.”

By the time people were making fun of “Darla” for exposing this clear contradiction that only serves as an argument in favor of unions, whoever was behind the account was a step away from begging for mercy.

“I love everyone’s passion about this important issue and I apologize if any of my rhetoric has reflected poorly on Amazon. Of course Amazon understands the value of unions and is not anti-union in any way.”

She then proceeded to kiss the butt of Amazon’s new CEO. Less than 24 hours later, the account had been suspended.

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After these two disasters, it’s become something of a trend on Twitter to pretend to be anti-union Amazon sock puppet accounts because it’s extremely funny.

hi guys, just logging on to say i love to work in my job at amazon warehouse. my name is nape. i am 29.75 years existing. moving boxes is my favorite human pastime. i urinate frequently and always in the small white being known as toirlet. please do not give me the human rights!

— soul nate (@MNateShyamalan) March 29, 2021

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Hi, not a bot! I’m not sure what you’re implying?? Burt is my brother. In fact, all my colleagues are my brothers and sisters. We are a family! I cannot wait for “The Awakening” when Papa Jeff “releases” us from our contracts. I look forward to being free of my Earthly form

— Joelle at DAK4 (@AtOak4) March 29, 2021

Darla here! Can somebody tell my two boys I won’t be home for supper since Amazon locked me in a dog cage? At least I THINK that’s what it is, it’s so dark in here! I actually like the peace and quiet other than this complainer with some missing fingers next to me!

— Darla at GYR1 (@shelbyenlow) March 30, 2021

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I work at Amazon and it’s an amazing place to work! Technically my job is to piss in Jeff’s mouth every hour on the hour (Jeff Bezos that is) so I’ve never been in the warehouse but I’m sure it’s awesome there too

— Dr. Piss Pants (@DoctorPissPants) March 30, 2021

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Hi. I’m Bob and I’m Amazon’s number one best employee here to tell you Unions are made by the Devil. Don’t make a deal with the devil. pic.twitter.com/T8P4oM2BdC

— JC (@hessianchef) March 30, 2021

Yes I work at Amazon they allow me to lick the boxes with my mouth

— Lilly mothcub (@cubmoth) March 30, 2021

I work at Amazon. We have never had to pee in bottles because we lack breaks and close bathrooms. We pee in the bottles because it’s the only thing Jeff Bezos will drink and if he doesn’t get his 2 gallons of pee a day he’ll put one of us in the Amazon Prime blast furnace

— Joey (@joeygllghr) March 27, 2021

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*First Published: March 30, 2021, 11:29 am