Photo via Bryce Brewer/Facebook
March 31, 2022, 1:19 pm
A Christian youth pastor in Washington state released a surprise statement last summer apologizing for his own former policy that singled out girls and their bodies for scrutiny the way that many U.S. churches, as well as schools, often do. The pastor, Bryce Brewer, says that he had been working with Christian youth groups for 20 years and had issued a decree that girls were only allowed to wear one piece swimsuits at his summer camp—something he now regrets.
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“I have been a youth pastor on and off for over 20 years, and I have issued the ridiculous ultimatum to my female students at summer camp ‘ONE PIECE SWIMSUITS ONLY,’” he wrote in a Facebook post. “First of all I am sorry.”
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The patriarchal culture in both the U.S. and in Christianity in general puts the onus on women and girls to “hide” their bodies from men and boys, of course assuming that all are straight, treating the male section of the population like animals who can’t control themselves. Doing this kind of thing to girls also sexualizes underage bodies, adding a layer of deep grossness to something that is already absurd and deeply harmful, setting up female persons to view their own bodies as bad or “sinful.”
After 20 years, Brewer finally figured this out.
“I am sorry that I didn’t teach boys to control themselves,” he said, listing the points of his apology. “I am sorry I laid the weight of purity on a girls swimsuit while she was swimming, and not on the boys responsibility to not be gross.”
He further apologized for making the girls and their families go on a desperate last-minute search for non-ugly one piece swimwear, which he had to do himself for his fiance’s daughter after getting caught up in his own rule. Though difficulty shopping is hardly the worst part of this rule, his personal difficulty in following his own decree helped him realize how ridiculous he was being.
“I wandered with them through several department stores and through Target trying to find a cute-but-appropriate one-piece bathing suit and they’re very very difficult to find,” he told TODAY Parents. “I watched a frustration build with both of them, almost a dejection.”
That single shopping trip made Brewer reconsider the previous 20 years of his life, and afterward, he says he went home and immediately began writing up his apology. In addition to making and enforcing the rule, he also regrets letting a bunch of grown men come along and lead discussions on what the girls in their charge should be allowed to wear while the boys didn’t have to worry about their own bodies.
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“I am sorry that we have deemed a young women’s body as something that ‘needs to be covered’ and let young men’s bodies be ok to be seen,” he continued. “I am sorry I ever let this be an item of discussion, usually lead by men, at any youth leader meeting … this must have been awful for my female leaders and students to be part of.”
Can confirm, it is awful when men do that.
Brewer’s apology gained widespread approval, with over 74,000 reactions on the post that are overwhelmingly positive. While some commenters are clearly still stuck in a patriarchal mindset, many were glad to see that more Christian pastors are coming around to see the wisdom in what feminists and many women in general have been trying to explain to them for many decades.
“Remind the boys that the bible instructs you to cut out your eyes and discard them to avoid having a lustful gaze,” wrote one commenter.
“This was so refreshing!” said another. “Thank you for speaking out against sexism. It’s never easy to admit a mistake but acknowledgment and accountability are big steps toward making things right.”
*First Published: March 31, 2022, 1:19 pm
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